Chef in a Box; marry or eat?

Ready Meals are a HUGE market and like my early menopausal waistline, expanding by the minute. I even created a few of those Fine-Dining-in-a-Box moments at Marks & Spencers, Tescos and Sainsbury’s, in the crazy cocktail days of leading an innovation consultancy. Neither Natasha, co-founder of Headliners, nor I were gifted cooks, so we loved working out how to get a chef into the kitchen without actually marrying one. Now I’m in the glamazone of Australian countryside, that in-home chef in-a-box is needed more than ever, purely for self-esteem reasons if nothing else. Every man, woman and B&B owner seem to be one apron away from winning MasterChef, while I’m still floundering around trying to regulate an old gas oven with two temperatures; hot and OFF.

Thankfully, Daylesford is a rural outpost of Marks & Spencers ready-to-eat aisle, with more straight-from-the-garden/ paddock/ oven Ready-to-Eat meal options than mutton suburbanites dressed up as lamb . At this rate, I might not need to marry a chef. Now.... what to eat tonight?

Grocery shopping for dinner began with a macchiato and melting moment (there’s that waistline issue again) at Larder (previously Gourmet Larder until just a few days away) in Daylesford. Their delicatessen at the back is my out-of-home refrigerated pantry, crammed with melt-in-the-mouth cheeses, locally cured hams & prosciutto, plump olives, antipasto and tapas fabulousness. However today I was drawn more to the shelves heaving under the weight of  Larder's signature Relishes and Jams. Beetroot Relish, Green Tomato Pickle, Potato Pickle, Tomato Relish, and throwing a cat among the cockatoos, Quince Jam. Preserved and slow cooked in the Larder Kitchens. So fresh and chunky, you can all but visualise the veges rolling in from the garden, dusting themselves off, then waiting patiently for the chop.  

I desperately wanted some quiet time to nibble through the butter cream filling and mull WHICH  relish, and WHAT to do with it. But co-owner Luke kept distracting me with chatter about cold drip coffee brewing methods, single origin beans from goodness knows where and “why do people put milk in coffee?” rhetoric. Incredibly interesting, but the only thing on my mind was dinner. Had to resort to Below-the-Counter tactics, encouraging  patrons walking through the door to ask for coffee in Owl Take Away cups featured on the cover of Lost Magazine recently. Forcing Luke to race out to the storeroom for more Owls. Peace at last. Back to the relishes. Seemed wrong to discriminate, so bought one of each. In little antipasto pots. YUM.

That sorted, next stop was Harvest Café. The Monte Carlo of Pies. On any given day, Harvest Café is serving between 14-18 varieties of seasonal handmade pies. Lamb & Guinness, Chicken & Mushroom, Chicken Zucchini & Feta, Moroccan Lamb, Beef & Onion, Thai Chicken. You get the picture. The wholemeal shortcrust pastry has a slightly nutty flavour but really is all about the butter. Giving me the second melting moment for the day.  Worth eating these pies JUST FOR THE PASTRY.

Saying that, the pie fillings more than hold their own in the style stakes.  Harvest Café’s chef, Anthony explained that the best pie fillings are fine seasonal ingredients, slow cooked over many hours. After dining on the Beef & Mushroom (with the relish antipasto plate), I wholeheartedly agree. The beef was like shank meat, falling off the bone in moist chunky shreds. Whole chestnut mushrooms, tender without going mushy. No bland gravy in sight.  The final piece de resistance is the principality size of each pie. 

Now that's what I call a Ready Meal (as Mother would say). Although I'd still marry a chef should the opportunity arise.

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